I Sat in Britney's Lemonade..

Okay...  this is probably my only claim to fame this year but hey!   It's my story and I'm going to tell it!
I didn't think this was such a big deal at the time but I guess I could have been a little more excited about my encounter with Britney Spears.   
Back in September 2002 I was travelling home from Boston.   It was going to be a long haul flight taking 39 hours and 5 planes so I was hardly about to let the other passengers disturb my plans for a restful (read: drug induced) trip home.

It was when I changed to plane number 2 at Minneapolis when it was getting very late at night.   I was finishing off my first G&T in first class...... (don't ask)  when the flight attendants were about to close the door to the plane.   I was sitting in the first row of the plane when a skinny blonde girl bounced down into the seat next to me.   I wouldn't have normally taken any notice of who it was but she was dressed kinda kookie for this part of middle America.   And I think most of the passengers near the front were checking her out too.

It wasn't until the flight attendants started making a fuss of her and she pulled out some photos from some shoot that I realised that it was Britney Spears.   And stupid me wondered if she was at all well known in America!     And I hadn't even popped my first tammy!  Where the hell did I think she was from???   And I have to say at this point....  she looks a lot older in real life.

She was giggling because of all the attention she was getting.  And then she said that she was embarrassed because the skimpy little thing she was wearing was the most conservative thing she'd packed for the trip.

Anyway, no....  I didn't get an autograph, I didn't get a photo and I didn't quiz her about her relationship with Justin.    I was playing it cool by pretending not to be interested in her in the slightest...   which was almost true strangely enough.   Let's remember the 39 hours plane trip.  I was more interested in getting as many G&Ts mixed with Temazapan for the long haul across to Asia.

They then turned the lights off and threw a rug over Ms Spears.    Then it happened....  I was busting for a pee and Britney had taken advantage of the full fold out seat.   I had to climb over her!   Then on the way back I was just about finished my hurdle over her legs when I bumped her half glass of lemonade into my seat.

I was going to apologise but then saw the look of "that had better have not touched me" on her little face wrapped in the blanket so I thought I should just keep quiet.    I mopped up as much as I could and then sat in it.   I knew the airconditioned plane would eventually dry me off.

When we landed in LA  Britney had preened herself and was already on her feet ready to dart out the door first.   But they only opened the second door so she ended up having to wait for everyone else to exit and then she ended up leaving with the coach passengers.   She headed straight for an ATM.   I didn't hang about to see who was meeting her.  I had a plane to catch.

She seemed like a nice enough girl.    But a question....    why would Britney travel by herself?  And if she did have to travel by herself why wouldn't she buy the seat next to her as well so she wouldn't have her drinks knocked over by a clutts like me?

It was 7Up by the way   :)

You can buy my Lemonade (with Britney's backwash) stained pants on Ebay at .......................
 

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